It really isn't all about me

I’ve been feeling guilty about posting such a long post about my experience with pain yesterday, so I decided to post about some things of note going on here in Rockland:

A company called Yachting Solutions is again applying for state and federal environmental permits for its $3 million plan to expand its marina at the south end of Rockland’s harbor while city officials are proposing a separate plan to redevelop the inner harbor.   Rockland citizens have expressed concerns about how the development would impact boat traffic, the scenery, and the character of the harbor.  Apparently a related plan was approved in 2008, but the company didn’t secure grants and other financing.  So they’re back now.  One resident has formed a new group to oppose the project called Sensible Harbor Infrastructure Plan (S.H.I.P).  Right now I tend to lean against this plan.  It seems to intend to refocus the infrastructure of the Rockland harbor in favor of private industry, private yachts that visit, and cruise ships. Our city is known for hosting a number of festivals that draw thousands of visitors and support various charities - the Blues Festival, the Lobster Festival and Homes, Ships and Harbors Festival - and I understand the end result of this development could cut back significantly on the size of the city's property on which these festivals take place.  

Lobster Festival Parade on our block!

Generally, I also have my suspicions about corporations claiming that they're doing us citizens a favor.  But I'm keeping an open mind (well, sort of).  I love Rockland's harbor:

Rockland Breakwater Lighthouse

Another “hot” local issue is short-term rental (like Airbnb).  I missed the City Council meeting that included public comment on this, but I understand it was heated.  The end result seems to be proposal of a bill permitting short-term rentals but limiting them to a specific number (something like 47 or 48) and requiring annual licenses.  I think the proposal would also limit the number of short-term rentals by non-residents (meaning you buy the property but don't live in it, just rent it for periodic short-term rentals).

That issue also relates to the related “fill in” issue, which would permit Rockland property owners to build small additions to existing properties, such as in-law apartments or the like, which is currently limited by zoning regulations.  Those in favor of this argue that this would help bring income to homeowners facing ever-increasing property taxes (which are ever increasing in part because our GOP governor just refuses to implement various laws and regulations, including the requirement to pass back a certain percentage of state income to municipalities to fund schools; he just decided unilaterally to pass back less, meaning cities and towns like Rockland have had to make up the difference); they also think this would create more “affordable housing," a critical need in Rockland where a 2-bedroom apartment costs $1,000 or more while 90% of our elementary kids qualify for free or subsidized lunches.  Those against loosening "fill in" zoning regulations say they want to retain the “character” of our neighborhoods.  They don’t want their houses jammed up other houses that weren't permitted when they bought their property (of course, on many streets, including mine, we already live like that, probably because this was always a working class street).  

Our house - and our wonderful neighbor on the north side

I don’t buy the pro "in-fill" arguments.  I think the driving force behind the “in-fill” proponents is more likely wanting the ability to offer Airbnb type rentals and I certainly don’t think the additional small apartments will provide any significant “affordable” housing.  On the other hand, I don’t really give a rat’s ass about preserving the so-called “character” of Rockland which, as I see it, is always a moving target.   A decade ago or so, they used to say “Camden By The Sea, Rockland By The Smell.”  (Camden is a wealthier, more summer-intensive community 11 miles north of us.)  But Rockland has evolved and is still evolving. Today, Rockland seems to be an up-and-coming location; we're actually becoming "trendy," dealing with both the Up and Down sides of that evolution.

One strength we have over towns like Camden is our diversity.  We are still home to working class people, lobstermen and factory workers, service industry workers, as well as year-round retirees. Although if we become much "trendier," people like this won't be able to afford housing here (or taxes on houses they already own).  Here's the yard of the Rockland house seen in the background; you can tell because it's a Maine house because the yard includes lobster traps, several boats and what we call a "pile," which is stuff you know you want for something but not in your house.  

But Rockland also has a strong arts community, museums, galleries.  Rockland is home to a significant number of wealthy residents, including some - but still very much a minority - summer-only residents.  A couple of current homes for sale in Rockland"

$940,000

"Only" $497,850

We are becoming a vacation “destination” both for other Mainers and for cruise ships (and that’s another controversy - should we encourage MORE cruise ship visits, especially by the gigantic 2,500 passenger carriers, or not?  Do cruise ship visits help or hurt our local economy?).  Here are some recent cruise line visitors:

Megaship at Rockland Breakwater

Cruise liner coming into the harbor

Personally I think all of these issues point to an underlying issue our community faces of what it means to undergo “sustainable development.”  It’s one of the reasons I volunteer with a local non-profit group founded by three younger Rockland residents, called Renew Rockland.  Sustainable development is what Renew Rockland is about; they advocate for renewable energy, waste reduction, recycling and composting, bicycle and pedestrian friendly streets, community gardens and farms.  

Personally, I want Rockland to stay and grow stronger as a community where traditional wooden boat building like this 

continues to take place right along side (sustainable) industrial development that supports decent paying jobs so all classes of people can afford to live here, pay taxes, fund good schools and enjoy Rockland.  

I guess the bottom line is ... I want it all for Rockland.

Okay, that’s what’s happening.  See ya later, deah.

And so it goes...

I know this is supposed to be a blog about life in the mid coast of Maine, but what I've been thinking about and dealing with in my life here over the last weeks, even months, is pain, my own pain (and I'm not even going to mention the much more significant pain of the families and students in Parkland, Florida, or of Dreamers let down by Democrats or ... need I go on?)

I can't remember when I posted here about my hip, the right one (or, actually, the wrong one), but it has been a real pain in the ass (literally!) for more than a year.  I've had a "bad" hip for many years, decades even, so if I walked too far (or back when I jogged, jogged more than 3 miles), it would hurt.  Then I'd rest it, take it easy for a few days, and be okay.  Over the years my osteoarthritis worsened, including in that hip, but apart from morning stiffness, which I could walk/exercise out, it was basically okay.  In other words, the "pain" I had fell into levels 2 and 3 with an occasional foray into level 4 on the "Pain Scale":

2 = Discomforting. Minor pain, like lightly pinching the fold of skin between the thumb and first finger with the other hand, using the fingernails. Note that people react differently to this self test.

3 = Tolerable. Very noticeable pain, like an accidental cut, a blow to the nose causing a bloody nose, or a doctor giving you an injection. The pain is not so strong that you cannot get used to it. Eventually, most of the time you don't notice the pain. You have adapted to it.

4 = Distressing. Strong, deep pain, like an average toothache, the initial pain from a bee sting, or minor trauma to part of the body, such as stubbing your toe real hard. So strong you notice the pain all the time and cannot completely adapt. This pain level can be simulated by pinching the fold of skin between the thumb and first finger with the other hand, using the fingernails, and squeezing real hard. Note how the simulated pain is initially piercing but becomes dull after that.

Until Christmas 2016.  As we had for several years, we volunteered at the Soup Kitchen's Christmas Community Dinner and I was on my feet for 8 hours or more.  (Standing has always been the hardest on my hip, much harder than walking.)  That's when the real trouble began.   I tried for 6 or 7 weeks to deal with it, but the hip wouldn't "go back" to the way it had been.  Now the pain reaches level 4 much if not most of the time and even up to level 5 on the "Pain Scale":

5 = Very Distressing. Strong, deep, piercing pain, such as a sprained ankle when you stand on it wrong or mild back pain. Not only do you notice the pain all the time, you are now so preoccupied with managing it that you normal lifestyle is curtailed. Temporary personality disorders are frequent.

(Well, I'm not so sure about the "temporary personality disorders!)

So I went to my doctor, who sent me to the orthopedic practice, who took x-rays and said I had bone on bone.  She sent me home with a super-ibuprofen type prescription.  I took it and it helped, but it came with dire warnings about stomach bleeding and after a few weeks I began having stomach pain.  So I asked for something else. She told me there was nothing else to do other than a cortisone injection.  I put that off for weeks and then months.  Finally in August, I had it done.  It helped (wasn't magic, but did help) ... for about 4 weeks, maybe 5 weeks.  When the positive effects wore off, I put up with it again ... for weeks.  Then finally I made an appointment with the Joint Replacement Center down in Falmouth (about 80 miles south of here).

I saw them in January.  More x-rays.  Confirmation of the bone-on-bone and even some further disintegration of the socket or something.  (Good news:  my left hip is fine!)  Next step.  Total hip replacement.  Earliest appointment they had for the surgery is April 19th.  Now I wait.

Meanwhile, the hip worsens.  The pain increases, both in intensity and duration, meaning I'm in pain most of the time and much worse pain some of the time.  It's hitting level 6 now:

6 = Intense. Strong, deep, piercing pain so strong it seems to partially dominate your senses, causing you to think somewhat unclearly. At this point you begin to have trouble holding a job or maintaining normal social relationships. Comparable to a bad non-migraine headache combined with several bee stings, or a bad back pain.

Ironically I have looked at this "Pain Scale" many times over the past months, but not in the recent weeks.  And posting it here, now, I realize that the description in level 6 about having trouble "maintaining normal social relationships" is probably true.  The pain has caused me to curtail almost all my out-of-the-house activities.  I haven't been going to shul.  I have cut back on volunteer activities.  I even think twice, three times, before going next door to my neighbor's house.  In the morning, I still get up, and either with David or by myself, take Ella for her morning walk, but much shorter, and it is hard.  (On the other hand, if I DON'T walk, I stiffen up and that's worse!)  I ride in the car with David driving (easier to get in the passenger side since I put my butt in and then can bring in the bad leg than in the driver's side where the bad leg has to lead) and sometimes drive myself.  I take Ella for her nighttime walk - much shorter.  I do a handful of other errands outside of the house, go to the library, an occasional meeting, but I am home much much more of the time.  That's okay; I'm reading a lot; playing music (and even occasionally vacuuming and cleaning other stuff, like the bathroom.)

At the January appointment they watched me walk and asked if I had a cane (I do, but I hadn't brought it with me).  They told me to use it.  So I do now, any time I leave the house, I have it.  And recently, I keep it near me in the house.  Because when I sit for a while (basically more than 10-15 minutes), I am almost unable to walk for the first few moments after I stand up.  So the cane helps then.

The good news is, I haven't hit level 7 ... yet (7 = Very Intense. Same as 6 except the pain completely dominates your senses, causing you to think unclearly about half the time. At this point you are effectively disabled and frequently cannot live alone. Comparable to an average migraine headache.) 

I sincerely want to miss out on 7, 8, 9 and 10 with this hip (10 = Unimaginable and Unspeakable. Pain so intense you will go unconscious shortly. Most people have never experienced this level of pain. Those who have suffered a severe accident, such as a crushed hand, and lost consciousness as a result of the pain and not blood loss, have experienced level 10.  I have known level 10 - that's what I felt when I shattered my wrist and dislocated my elbow slipping on black ice, and doctors at the ER had to pull on my shattered wrist in order to put my elbow back in the socket; I passed out.)

I know this has been a downer post - but it IS what I've thinking about when not getting outraged over the political situation or dealing with other family problems.  (David's sister was in the hospital in Lewiston, and forced to move out of her newly occupied subsidized apartment, but is now recovered and moved to North Carolina; David's brother had kidney failure, went to the hospital, suffered cardiac arrest, was revived, put on a respirator and unclear whether he would survive; stayed in ICU on dialysis for 8 or 9 days, but he also "recovered" to breathe on his own again, no longer requires dialysis and is now in a nursing home trying to regain enough strength to stand and walk with a walker.  I am reminded to be grateful for everything that is good!  For instance, my children and grandchildren are well, even thriving.)

In that vein, I will close with a couple of photos from a recent walk through downtown Rockland where there is a wonderful new mural painted by a local artist last fall.  Seeing it there always makes me smile.  Posting the photos here does, too.